


High School Crash Course: DON'T DIE (AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK)

by ThePrimeOfChaos



Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cussing, Drama, Insanity, Other, Shitty Writing, Teenage Drama, The Author Regrets Nothing, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, Transformers High School AU, WELCOME TO CYBERTRON HIGH, group chats, i'm so sorry for creating this monstrosity, it scarred everyone, kitty cat roaming the halls, soundwave is ready to lose his shit, there is a bet, things are about to go crazy, we do not speak about the last chat war
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2020-04-10
Packaged: 2020-12-27 02:23:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21111119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThePrimeOfChaos/pseuds/ThePrimeOfChaos
Summary: Welcome to Cybertron High! You're going to die here. Enjoy your years here!





	1. WHAT DO YOU MEAN VENTS?!

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact, a friend said this to me as I was writing the story: "It's bascically "High School Crash Course: DON'T DIE AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK". And I was like "You just helped me with the title of this fanfic!" and they were like "Cool" before going back to going over this for grammatical errors.
> 
> They're grammar police:p
> 
> Also thank you CatsaucEe for inspiring me to create this madness. >:)

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE'S IN THE VENTS?!" Prowl screeched. "JAZZ ISN'T SUPPOSED TO BE UP THERE!" Smokescreen rolled his eyes.

"Prowl, he'll be fine. He's a freaking GYMNAST!" Smokescreen drawled, fishing out a notebook and calculator. Prowl turned to glare at his cousin, annoyance in his eyes. "Can't you be serious about this?!" hissed Prowl. Smokescreen rolled his eyes again.

"Prowl, I am being serious," said Smokescreen, closing his locker. Hoisting his backpack on his shoulders, he looked at him one more time. "Jazz is going to be FINE."

Prowl glared at him before sighing. "I guess you're right." he grumbled. Smokescreen smirked, "I'm always right."

"No, you AREN'T!" growled Prowl, "Whenever you day you are right, you are WRONG!" 

Smokescreen grinned, "Love ya too, Prowlie!" Prowl's eye twitched.

"DO NOT CALL ME THAT!!!"

* * *

"You were saying?" Prowl drawled, gesturing towards the broken ceiling. On the broken table was a sheepish-looking Jazz. Smokescreen glared at him while Optimus, Ironhide, Ratchet, Avery, Tasia, Skids, and Ultra Magnus stared at the table with shock.

"Heeeey?" Jazz said hesitantly, silently wondering what was going on in their heads. Ultra Magnus was the first one to come back to his senses.

"JAZZ!" Ultra Magnus growled, "It is against the school's rules to be in the the ceilings because you could get lost, get hurt, damage the vent system, clog something, or-" Optimus placed a hand on his shoulder, silencing his rant.

"Magnus." Optimus said calmly, "I'm sure Jazz will learn his lesson." Both Jazz and Ultra Magnus looked at the junior confused.

"Wha' do ya mean?" Jazz asked. Optimus then pointed to the doorway, an amused smile on his lips. There in the doorway stood Ms. Smith.

"Jazz." She hissed, "Go to the office NOW." Jazz gulped, look at the woman with terrified eyes. **NO ONE **wanted to go to the office. **ESPECIALLY **to see **_HIM_**.

Principal Zeta Prime. The worst person in the **UNIVERSE**.

"We'll attend your funeral," Tasia said solemnly. Skids snickered at this. Jazz just gave her a betrayed look.

"You're so MEAN!" whined Jazz.

* * *

"How the FRAG did YOU get sent to the OFFICE?!" Jazz demanded, staring at him with shock.

Soundwave just looked away from him.

"Awww, is the bwig bwad Decepticon pwouting?" Jazz cooed, a grin on his face. Soundwave whipped around to glare at him. His hand curled into a fist, anger sparking in his eyes.

"It is none of your concern." growled Soundwave, "Besides, shouldn't you be preparing for your own inevitable doom?" Jazz's grin fell and a fearsome snarl replaced it. His own hand curled into a fist, quickly rising to throw the punch.

Fortunately for Soundwave, Jazz didn't get the chance. 

"JAZZ! IN MY OFFICE, **NOW**!" Zeta shouted. Jazz quickly lowered his head and fist dejectedly and quietly walked to the Zeta's office. He then heard something that startled him.

"And YOU! Don't think I FORGOT that YOU brought a PANTHER to SCHOOL!" Zeta screeched. Jazz stared at the boy, shock gleaming in his eyes. 

"YA BROUGH' A PANTHER TA SCHOOL?!" Jazz screeched. He couldn't believe the silent boy had done that!

Soundwave discreetly flipped the bird at Jazz. It took all of Jazz's willpower to not lunge forward and break his NECK.

* * *

"WHAT WERE YOU EVEN THINKING **GOING UP** THERE?!" Prowl screeched, shaking the dejected Jazz.

"He wasn't." Sunstreaker said, bored, drawing something in his sketchbook, "No one does in this hellhole." His brother, Sideswipe, turned to look at him, offended.

"HEY!" Sideswipe protested, "I do think!" Sunstreaker looked at him unimpressed. "You only think when it comes to pranks." Sideswipe sputtered.

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Do not!"

Do too!"

"Do NOT!"

"Do TOO!"

"Liar, liar **SHIT'S ON FIRE**!" Sideswipe screeched.

"Hi!" a new voice chirped. They quickly turned to see a redhead with white tipped bangs staring at them.

He waved at them. 

"Who in the world are YOU?!" Prowl demanded. At the same time, they simultaneouly thought, _oh shit, that's his first impression of us._

"Tha name's Blaster!" he smiled, "Sooo, what are ya guys doin'?" Sideswipe, Prowl, Jazz, and Sunstreaker stared at him stunned. _How was this person so cheerful?_

"Haven't seen you around before." Sideswipe blurted out. Blaster looked at him, amused. "Ah was homeschooled." he revealed. 

_No wonder he is so damn cheerful, _thought Sunstreaker. Jazz smirked at Blaster. "Well then, welcome ta Cybertron High. Ya're gonna die here!" Blaster looked at him confused.

"Um, why?" he asked. Jazz grinned, "Ya come to tha school, there are two gangs, both hate each other, and tha staff want ya dead." Blaster raised an eyebrow at him.

"Okay?" Blaster muttered, "Anyway, do you know why Soundwave's in the office?" Prowl looked at him, surprised.

"You know him?"

"No, I heard Zeta screaming his name and threatening to call Animal Control on Ravage." Blaster answered.

"Who's Ravage?" Sideswipe demanded. Blaster looked at him, confused before his eyes widened.

"Oh! Ravage is a panther Soundwave an' his family are takin' care of." said Blaster. They stared at him with shock.

"Ya're sayin tha's why Soundwave has a panther an' why he brough' it here?!" Jazz screeched. Blaster stared at him with shock before an annoyed look appeared in his eyes.

"Excuse me, I need to yell at him." Blaster excused himself politely. He quickly ran out of the lunchroom, a determined expression on his face.

A few moments passed before the silence was broken by Sunstreaker and Prowl.

"WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!"


	2. Cat Out of the Vent

“You got in trouble for going in the vents?!” Skywarp exclaimed.

“I wasn’t in the vents, I was in the office listening to Zeta ask absurd questions such as “did you even think at all before bringing a panther to school?!” Yes, I did and ** I ** decided it was worth the risks! OBVIOUSLY something went WRONG.” snapped Soundwave.

Megatron growled. “What went wrong is Ravage saw me, popped out of the vents and gave me kisses.”

“HA!” laughed Strika while Sadie rolled her eyes before returning to her book. Megatron just glared at her.

“You try having a hundred and ninety-five pounds overgrown cat crush you!” Megatron shot at her. The boy next to Skywarp, Thundercracker, rolled his eyes at the situation.

“I’m going to go write,” Thundercracker said tersely. He walked away from them, rolling his eyes again. Looking at him with sympathy was Lucy, one of the new freshmen.

She also got along with Thundercracker fantastically.

“They being crazy again?” Lucy asked. Thundercracker nodded.

“NOOO! DON’T LEAVE MEEE!!!” Skywarp wailed clinging to his arm.

“I’m going to be in the courtyard!” Thundercracker protested.

“You’re still leaving!” he wailed again. Thundercracker looked at him aghast. Turning to Megatron and Soundwave, he pleaded silently with his eyes.

Sighing, Megatron and Soundwave moved to peel Skywarp off him and if needed, call Starscream to help.

That didn’t happen.

“SOUNDWAVE YOU IDIOT!” a foreign voice yelled, his shout echoing in the hallway. Everyone froze, Autobots, Decepticons, and Neutrals alike, wondering who was stupid enough to outright call one of the most dangerous people in the school an idiot.

They turned to see a boy stalking towards them, white bangs covering a part of his forehead.

The boy was wearing baggy gray sweatpants, the cord of the headphones around his neck dangling like chains. The storming teen had a red t-shirt with a yellow vest over it, but the thing that caught their attention was his blazing silver-blue eyes. 

“What were you thinking to bring Ravage to SCHOOL?!” The redhead demanded.

“Who are you?” Soundwave asked, confused. The boy stopped in front of him, his glare seeming to burn right through him. “I’m Karmen’s brother, Blaster.”

“You aren’t like Karmen, are you?” Fear filled Soundwave’s voice. Megatron looked at him with confusion. Blaster responded bluntly.

“No, if I was, you’d be dead by now.”

Suddenly, a black creature burst out of the vents. Lunging forward, it tackled Balster to the ground.

“Ravage no!” Soundwave exclaimed, worried the panther would maul him.

To his surprise, he saw Ravage give him a kiss before disappearing into the vents.

“How did you not die? HOW DID YOU NOT DIE?!” Soundwave screamed. Blaster blinked, “I know Ravage.”

“WHAT?!” Soundwave screeched, “HOW?!” Before Blaster could answer, the bell rang, signaling the next period would start soon.

“Welp, bye Soundwave!” Blaster waved. Soundwave screamed, “NO. YOU ARE NOT LEAVING WITHOUT TELLING ME. HOW. YOU. KNOW. RAVAGE!”

“Sorry, can’t talk right now, bye!” After this, Blaster ran down the hall.

“YOU COME BACK HERE AND EXPLAIN!” The blue-haired boy screeched. Behind him, he heard a snort. Turning, he saw Megatron smirking at him.

“Miss your boyfriend already?” Megatron asked, amused.

“Perish.” Soundwave hissed.

“You guys have balls.” Skywarp chirped. Thundercracker looked at the black-haired teen horrified while Megatron and Soundwave looked at him confused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Megatron: Junior  
Soundwave: Junior  
Skywarp: Junior  
Thundercracker: Junior  
Sadie: Freshman  
Strika: Sophmore
> 
> I'm back and ready to bring hell :)


	3. Chat Wars

September 9, Monday 2:41 A.M

\-----------------------------

SoundTheWaves-Soundwave

Megabeotch-Megatron

IamaStar-Starscream

WarpingWorld-Skywarp

Crackingthunder-Thundercracker

Shockingwaves-Shockwave

\-----------------------------

WarpingWorld: hey does anyone have the answers for the math homework?

WarpingWorld: and while we’re at it, please tell me Soundwave has a crush on the new guy.

WarpingWorld: i made a bet with Swindle.

IamaStar: What the hell, Skywarp?! I was aleep!

IamaStar: *asleep

Crackingthunder: didn’t you do your homework?

WarpingWorld: Uhhhh

Megabeotch: He didn’t do it.

SoundTheWaves: Why are you morons awake at this hour?

IamaStar: GLITCH! Stop acting oh so HIGH AND MIGHTY!

Shockingwaves: Hypocrite

Ⓢⓗⓞⓒⓚⓘⓝⓖⓦⓐⓥⓔⓢ ⓛⓔⓕⓣ ⓣⓗⓔ ⓒⓗⓐⓣ

SoundTheWaves: Normally, I don’t agree with my _ dear _ cousin, but this is one of those rare times I do.

SoundTheWaves: Starscream, you’re a hypocrite.

IamaStar: Shut the fuck up, you monotone asswipe

SoundTheWaves: Anyways, what’s going on?

Crackingthunder: ^^^

Megabeotch: ;)

SoundTheWaves: ….

SoundTheWaves: WHAT?!

SoundTheWaves: YOU MADE A BET ABOUT ME!!!!

SoundTheWaves: AND I DO NOT HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM!

WarpingWorld: YOU HEARD IT HEAR FOLKS! SOUNDWAVE HAS A CRUSH!

SoundTheWaves: NO. I. DON’T!

IamaStar: And another Chat War has begun

Crackingthunder: pls no

Megabeotch: It better not end up like the last one.

September 9, Monday 6:41 A.M

Shockingwaves: WTF!!!

Shockingwaves: WHY DO I HAVE 666 MISSED MESSAGES?!

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, that's the end of chapter one!
> 
> Here's the list of what years the characters that have appeared are in.
> 
> Smokescreen: Sophmore  
Prowl: Junior  
Optimus Prime: Junior  
Minerva:Freshmen  
Ultra Magnus: Senior  
Jazz: Junior  
Skids: Sohpmore  
Soundwave:Junior  
Blaster: Junior  
Sideswipe: Junior  
Sunstreaker: Junior  
Avery: Freshmen  
Tasia: Freshmen
> 
> I know, that's a lot of juniors. :p


End file.
